Unintelligent Monkey

The  is a monkey that is very unintelligent. It attempts to pop Bloons by rubbing them, but this does no damage to the Bloon and causes the monkey to take 1 HP of damage each time it attacks. It has a 90px range. It costs $100.

Pet Bloon? ($200)
The unintelligent monkey now tries to keep the Bloon as a pet. This still does no damage, and the monkey takes 3 damage per attack now because the Bloon attacks it to escape.

But it's squishy! ($700)
The unintelligent monkey now tries to use Bloons as pillows. This makes the Bloons rage, and do 7 damage to the unintelligent monkey.

Cuddlez! ($1500)
The unintelligent monkey now tries to cuddle the Bloons. This makes them rage more, doing 12 damage to the monkey.

I want a blimp! ($6000)
The unintelligent monkey now tries to grab onto blimps. When it grabs a blimp, it gets taken with it, never to be seen again.

Worse Eyesight ($150)
The monkey accidentally throws rocks into his eyes, decreasing range by 50 px.

Glasses ($180)
The monkey gets glasses, increasing it's range again, but only for one shot. (They fall off and break XP)

Pi? ($600)
The monkey attempts to recite Pi, but says 8.47862694(47,)&4;,6 instead. This makes the Bloons annoyed, so they attack the monkey.

A Dart? ($3000)
The monkey finds a dart on the ground, but stabs itself with it instead of the Bloons, doing 18 HP damage to it per shot. Suicide ability: Stabs extremely hard, killing itself. Cooldown: 0 seconds

Trivia

 * This tower is supposed to get worse when upgraded.